Anger Management 101: Don’t Let Your Anger Burn You

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Aside from being a threat to your relationships, anger could be dangerous to our health. It could elevate your blood pressure, causing terrible pressure to your cardiovascular system. Also, it could lead to headaches, anxieties, panic attacks, chest pains, muscle tension and breathing properly when released properly.


This is why anger management is an important thing to master. Here, the website Apost listed 5 ways to control your rage:



1. “Rethinking” your cognitive patterns.


When people get angry, they fall into a very specific pattern of verbal and physical reactions to deal with this emotion. On a smaller scale, they might internalize the emotion and walk away only to return later to confront the situation. But many others will immediately react verbally with curse words and confrontational behavior which sometimes becomes violent.


The problem with showing this kind of overt anger is that no problem ever gets solved because others who are involved will walk away from you or avoid you in the future. Consciously changing your pattern of behavior in that very first moments that you feel anger will change this. Instead, mindfully count to ten slowly and focus on calming yourself before you speak which immediately changes your negative reaction into a potentially positive one void of reactionary tendencies.



2. Find an outlet for the anger.


The worst kind of anger is one that we mull over for days. What that does is makes the wound fester and grow as opposed to finding a resolution to whatever the issue might be. The anger is the result and not the cause, so turn things around by finding the root of the issue and then focusing your energy on finding a solution to it instead. This might include changing your behavior or finding a means by which someone else can change theirs. It can also mean setting new rules, policies, boundaries and structures at work or at home to eliminate what is making you angry in the first place.



3. Develop some relaxation exercises.


If you don’t balance your stress with equal amounts of relaxation in your life, then your anger will control everything that you do and the outcomes of your daily activities at work and at home. People who make it their business to teach others how to relax, they know that you can’t just one day wake up and say you will be a more relaxed individual. You need to practice the skills of relaxation in order to accomplish this:

  • Set some realistic goals in your life including your relaxation time (visualize your goals) 
  • Create a time within your daily schedule for relaxation through physical activity like yoga, walking, swimming, or tai-chi 
  • Exercise your mind with meditation (breathe deeply and frequently throughout the day as well)



4. Practice forgiving others.


There is nothing that makes anger grow more than holding onto it. Rehashing the same issues over and over in your head long after the moment is gone only leads to repeating the moments of stress. It also adds resentment and bitter feelings between you and others because you have never taken the initiative to address what is making you angry. Part of that process is forgiving the other person first and telling them that you do. This will metaphorically press the restart button for all parties involved and rejuvenate the relationship so that everyone can take a brand new look at what is creating the anger and hopefully find a resolution that suits everyone.



5. Be a better listener.


Oftentimes, anger exists because we “hear” what we want to hear as opposed to what the person actually said and meant during a moment of crisis or problem arising, heightened emotions, or needing to meet a deadline. This can immediately invoke anger in us that makes us react instead of being proactive. Taking a moment to be silent and actually listen to what another person is saying, asking questions and clarifying what they mean is not only a more respectful way to communicate but far more productive and leads to reducing the risk of angry emotions erupting.


Based On Materials From Apost

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